As I sat to brainstorm another article for my ‘Sex Talk Sundays’ series, I started to think about why this was important to me. I began the idea on a serious note; to address the lack of awareness on consensual sex and the missing voice of women in sex-related conversations. Slowly, I saw how people, and I, perceived sexuality. It was either a health-related or an activism-driven discussion. The general question that I, and many, had was this…
In a world that grappled with many critical issues, was talking about sexuality was a luxury?
Sexuality is the way we identify ourselves and how we express sexual and/or romantic feelings towards others (if we do). It determines our attitudes and behaviour in relationships. Karl Pribram, a neuropsychologist, included sex as one of the basic human drives, alongside feeding, fighting, and fleeting. Drive states that are linked to our survival. That dictate our every feeling, thought, and behaviour.
Researchers and economists have found sexual wellbeing to be central to human wellbeing. Higher sexuality awareness or education meant a higher quality of life and stronger and more meaningful relationships. Countries that ranked high on the Human Development Index also ranked high on the Human Freedom Index.
If it is so fundamental to human development, why is it so neglected in those conversations? Ironically, despite being considered a luxury, it is the most debated and controlled aspect of our lives. Sexuality is what gives us complete autonomy over our bodies and is at the core of our existence. Making it just as wonderful, just as normal as any other part of the human experience.
To summarise my stream of thoughts with a quote from a research study,
“Only the human mind invents categories and tries to force facts into separated pigeon-holes. The living world is a continuum in each and every one of its aspects. The sooner we learn this concerning human sexual behaviour, the sooner we shall reach a sound understanding of the realities of sex.” (Kinsey, Pomeroy, & Martin, 1948)